Hog’s Breath Cafe – 695 Warrigal Road, Chadstone, Australia

If its an all-in doozy of a night that you’re after, then Hog’s Breath Cafe is the place for you. Packed to the brim with hungry folk and all kinds of random paraphernalia on the walls, this place is all about “having fun and enjoying yourself”. Their menu offers everything from pasta, seafood, sandwiches and ribs, but they’re claim to fame is an 18 hour Prime Rib Steak that can be ordered before you arrive if your worried about a sell out (it happens). It all began in 1989 by a gentleman by the name of Don Algie. After spending 4 years in Florida (some may suspect most of it at a TGIF’s), he sailed to the Whit Sundays looking for the perfect spot to set up his new venture. There in Airlie Beach, Queensland, he built the very first Hog’s Breath. Amidst the calamity and noise our waitresses Knick-Knack and Juno kindly pointed out some very enticing Burger-tarian options. We opted for the Cheeseburger in Paradise that included a grilled beef pattie topped with sliced cheddar cheese, lettuce, beetroot, tomato, red onion rings and smoked BBQ sauce all on an Aussie style Damper bun. With a hefty serve of HogsTail® fries on the side, we began the pig out.

“I was a little disappointed with this burger. For somewhere that really prides itself on the quality of their steaks and ribs, I was really let down by their poor meat pattie. I was expecting something big and bursting with juices, but in the end was it was small, dry and under seasoned. The burger was however, overloaded with tomato, beetroot and lettuce which, was too much so I ended up taking most of it out. The bun was a bit dry and didn’t really feel like it was the freshest thing I’ve ever had. The fries were actually pretty good though. Also if you’re going to make a Cheeseburger, at least make it cheesy!”

“This burger actually wasn’t as bad as I expected… it also wasn’t as big as I expected. It didn’t even leave me wishing I had worn tracksuit pants to dinner like all the other patrons. The beef had little flavour to it and the cheese wasn’t melted, but for some reason the smokey BBQ sauce made up for it. I obviously removed all of the beetroot. All the waitresses reminded me of that Juno movie and the curly fries – that were awesome – brought back fond memories of Queensland holidays.”

“It came out looking like a murder victim; insides spilling out and with a knife stuck in the middle. Not a good start to say the least. After taking a few snaps I took my first bite. The meat was OK: lightly seasoned with onions but it had a very pasty, totally over processed (and store bought) texture to it. I then went on a mission to pull out the 4 enormous slices of cold beetroot inside my burger. Sure, you can debate whether or not beetroot is a good choice in a burger all you like, but no one ever needs 4 bloody slices. This thing was meant to be a “Cheeseburger in Paradise”, but sadly it felt more like a “Cheeseburger in Syria”. I’m sure these guys do some wicked ribs and steaks, but as far as burgers go, its time to go back to the drawing board.”

2 comments

Click here to cancel reply.